Fifty-Fifty

So every now and again there's a shift in the social dynamics of life. And like any other change that takes place in life, changes in our social structures are probably some of the toughest changes to adjust to. We are constantly meeting new people in our day to day lives and often the decision on who stays and who goes is based on what the individual in question has to offer us. And so it follows that those with the least to offer are left out in the cold.
And so after ending a four year relationship with my first boyfriend, the social dynamics in my life began to shift drastically.  My best friend moved away to Tanzania, my other two friends being engaged to be married, and yet another moving to another city, not to mention the others already scattered all over the shore, I came to the sad realisation that my circle of friends was about to face a complete overhaul.

So I decided to take things into my own hands. I was going to carry out a social experiment which would hopefully result in my making new friends and extending my circle of friends. Every week, I'd try to text a few people from my phone book, just to let them know that they are thought of. I began by sending texts to people with whom I often interact with at church. Also, I tried to reconnect with friends I had lost touch with as a result of my negligence. The texts I sent didn't require a response, as my intention was to mainly let the individuals know that they were thought of. And once in a while I would make a phone call when funds permitted.

Like you have probably already guessed, I got all sorts of responses. This one friend who was privy to several phone calls always promised to call back. But alas... she never did. At first I would get very irritated by it but as time progressed I came to accept and expect it of her. Another friend after receiving a message from me went to the extent of calling back because he genuinely thought i wanted something from him, much to my embarrassment.

Got me thinking about the basis of the standing relationships I had with people. Was I only ever calling certain people because I wanted something from them? Or perhaps people just aren't used to having others be nice to them..
We are so used to relationships where people are always taking and never giving. 

Often times, we think that friendship is a fifty fifty thing.. I have come to realise that its about giving a hundred percent. Even if the other person doesn't reciprocate. Looking at JESUS and seeing his approach to friendship has shown me what being a true friend is. JESUS was a friend to even those who scorned Him and even  to those who crucified HIM, HE showed His kindness to them. JESUS was friend to everyone.. those looked down upon by the community (Zacchaeus), those who had horrible ailments (the Woman with the issue of blood), those who had short tempers (Simon Peter), those who were ashamed to be seen with Him (Nicodemus), the list is endless.  HIS desire was to see them saved. What was my main purpose of acquiring friends? Did I have friends and only have them for my own benefit, or did I seek their salvation..
True friendship, when I look at JESUS, is friendship that seeks the betterment of the other person. It only happens when I place aside all my selfish desires.

So this is me, learning to be a true friend. Even when it hurts and I feel as though nobody is looking out for me, even when all I want to do is give up.. True friendship is ceasing to seek my own.

Prayer: Dear Jesus. Teach me to be a true friend, not just to those I know.. and those who want to see me prosper.. but even to those who don't know me at all..

...nompi